Vance tries to purchase deodorant

In just a second, you will have some intimate knowledge of my grooming and hygiene habits. If that is TMI (too much information) then I would suggest you stop reading and go back to what you were doing.

But if you want to know what my attempts at buying a fumigator for my armpits has to do with your business, keep reading.

For as many years as I can remember, I have always used "unscented" deodorant. I am not sensitive to odors, don't have skin problems nor any allergies.

I just don't like going around smelling like a Centaur (half man, half horse) in the Old Spice commercials. Nor do I like Sandlewood, Lilacs or New Baby Bottom.

I will also pass on Coffee, Mango, Chai, Bacon or Fresh Fig scented underarm potions. All real scents...

I just want to smell like... well... me.

Our local Target seems to be the only place to get unscented deodorant within 30 miles of my house. So yesterday, I went on my monthly fumigant shopping trip only to find out that Target is no longer stocking it!

To say that I was devastated would be an understatement.

I went to the register with my other items I needed and a very cheerful manager asked "Did you find everything ok?

Now, I don't think this guy ever thought someone who was in the checkout line would ever say anything other than "Yes, I found everything".

He was beyond flummoxed when I said "No, I did not". He truly did not have an answer for me. He stumbled and mumbled over his words, obviously discombobulated. He was finally able to manage a feeble "I'm sorry".

Which brings me to your business.

Yes, this has everything to do with you and your business.

This guy was not trained in what to do if someone said "no" to his inquiry.

What could he or Target have done to ensure his success and and my happiness?

Training: Teach your employees what to say when they hear negative phases from clients and patients. Some possible candidates:

• "Wow, I am sorry to hear that. Let's go over to the computer and see what's going on"
• "Wow, sorry to hear that. Did you ask a team member for help?"
• "Our delivery truck just got here. Let me go see if it is there."
• "I will special order it for you. Give me your name and number and I will call you just as soon as it gets here."

Now is a good time as any to go quiz your team on their responses. You might be surprised.

Remember, you won't profit unless you implement,

Vance "Stinky Until Amazon Delivers" Morris